Is there such thing as justified procrastination?

Because, I really don't want to do all the homework I have to do today quite yet, but I just learned something I think is worth sharing. :)

  I go a private, religious college that holds weekly devotionals at which religious leaders and professors will tell us all kinds of wonderful things to help uplift and inspire us students.  Today, Lowell M. Snow talked to us about Success, and what real success is.  It of course was more directed to a religious aspect of success, which I learned a lot from about my own spirituality and goals, but I felt that this rings true to any aspect of life. 

The point Brother Snow made was that it is not necessarily the fruits of all we do ( ie the Boats, cars, money, power, PERFECT blood sugars etc.) it is our COMMITMENT to what we do that will measure true success.  Think of all those people who appear successful on the surface, but when we look at their lives a little closer we see kinds of chaos and other problems they have beneath their perceived "success."  Brother Snow said "Virtual success is no success at all."  The people we see who are really, truly "successful", are the ones who were committed to their cause, their goals, and true to themselves, regardless of what they have or achieved or gained because of it.  People who are really, truly successful, to do not compare themselves to others and their ideas of success.  People who are truly successful try their hardest, and to all they can.  This does not mean they do not experience disappointments, however, BUT they are never disappointed in themselves because they gave it their all. They were committed to the cause. 

I liken this to my diabetes.  For a longggg time I measured my diabetic "success" soley upon perfect numbers, not taking into account that my mutinous body sometimes has an agenda all it's own.  I saw others, who seemed  to have it all together and measured myself against them (OK, so I still do this but I am trying not to.) And, thinking I could never reach that level I stopped trying.  I was not committed, I measured myself against others, and now I realize this is why I  wasn't "succeeding."   

So here and now I am committed!

Committed to better care.

Committed to making my diabetes a priority.

Committed to learning about MY own body and working with it.

I will no longer measure myself against others.

I will always try to remember, that even when I try my best, sometimes my numbers will not always be perfect, but, I don't have to be disappointed or guilty.

I will learn that even when I don't always do everything I should, it is my chance to re-evaluate my commitment and change and ultimately become more committed! 

Because, I feel that in the end, the numbers won't matter.  

What will measure my success with diabetes is MY COMMITMENT to doing what I could with it, and turning it into something that helped me, rather than hurt me.

Everyday, I should ask myself:

Am I getting too caught up in perfect numbers and units? 

What can I do to be more committed?

How can I change for next time?

And most importantly....

Am I letting diabetes make me a better person or make me bitter and miserable? 

Success for my life with diabetes is NOT about perfect numbers, but my commitment to do my best with what I was given (yes I am implying diabetes is a gift, even though it hardly feels that way,) and become better than I was before!

That is all. 

"This is who I am and what I want to do.”-Will Hopoate