Hey Mama,

Happy Birthday! I've been thinking of you a lot the past few weeks. I just miss you more all the time.

I sent you a balloon at the spot where I always used to go to call you, I hope it gets there because right now it's really windy and it didn't actually go up the way I thought it would. Typical right? It's like the time I sent your Mother's Day card a month late. It's alright though because I know you probably got it, just like the card.

I sat up there and drank a Dr. Pepper (don't worry mom it was diet.) And thought about the many phone calls I made there, when I would sit in my car and cry to you about things that seem so silly now. You were so patient during those times. You always gave the best advice too.

I remember once calling you because I failed a Chemistry test, but really it was the last straw of a lot of stress and anxiety about my diabetes, and when I told you about it I thought you would be so mad I wasn't taking care I myself again, but you weren't. You just loved me and let me cry to you.

I remember once in high school being so worked up because I was the only one working on a group project and no one would help me. So on the day it was due you pulled me out of the class to go shopping because I had already done my part :)

Every time I was sick you would bring me Popsicles and sprite and sometimes a movie to watch together. The first time I got homesick at college was when I got sick and you weren't there to baby me! Hahaha

I remember when you took me to school, and I wanted to walk out to the parking lot with you when you left, but you wouldn't let me because you couldn't stand to drive off and see me in the rear view mirror (and you didn't want me to see you cry.)

Remember when I lied to you about skipping class and when I felt so bad and came to you crying to confess, and it took all you had not to burst out laughing at me?

I remember how you always answered the phone. "Hey my Ryanne, how are you?"

I remember how you never gave up on my dream to be a nurse even sometimes when I did.

I am so thankful for that time we had together when we drove from Montana to Oregon last Christmas in my little Geo Prism packed to the brim, so squished we could barely move. We were soooo sore and tired by the time we reached Washington. During the long hours we talked about all kinds of things. I asked you so many questions about how you and dad fell in love in only two weeks and how you knew he was the one. I asked you about growing up, and we talked about my future and my plans.

I had no idea 7 months later how precious that time would be to me.  

I still want to text you all the time about Syd and Melissa and how proud I am of them. I still want to call you and tell you about my roommates and friends and funny stories and all things I am doing in school. But I think you know anyway .

Thank you for teaching me to laugh, and where to get the best soda pops and most of all for never letting me doubt that you loved me. Even now I know that you still do. Thank you for keeping close, even though I imagine you are busy where you are I want you I know I am trying to do my part here too. I love you Mama. Happy Birthday!

Love, Rye